Teary_Eyed2's Backup Kleenex

Roses are red
Teary is twisted
Fandom, bend over
and prepare to be----sorry, my mind keeps drawing blanks these days *hee*

Sometimes I wish I was joking because I know I have to return love to people but I then forget *ties strings to fingers*

Where was I? Oh, something about a day for single peeps to feel miserable. Well, even though my memory's fucked I still have a speshul gift ... to look into the future (short as it may possibly be) for QaFdom.

I had a dream where I walked into a hotel (somewhere in Bumfuck, Georgia I think--anyone familiar with it?) and there was a crowd, ok it was one person behind a reception desk, under a banner which looked like this: *tries to remember how to insert something starting with 'p'*

I look at the program and realize that there's only 5 minutes left until the convention closes!

( *Slinks into the Babylon Conference Room* )

Thank you everyone for your holiday wishes and/or not getting sick of me.

But I must be getting sentimental in my old age because I have something for the conventionally inclined.

( Ok, maybe not completely *ev0l grin* )

'Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the loft
Not a creature was stirring
Except, well, a cock...

( Merry XXXmas my friends! )

Happy Naughty Thanksgiving to those who still give a stuff!

( Sorry, you only have QaF and my twisted mind to thank )

I had this dream.  A non-defined, non-conventional dream I'm going to be sick silly enough to share.

In it, CowLip had hit rockbottom (no sex pun intended) career-wise and decided they were desperate enough for attention to do a fan interview another season of QaF.  Somehow they managed to convince Randy and Gale to return.  (I think they promised Randy a free trip to Paris and Gale, since his motorcycle accident, forgot what they did to Brian's character.)  

I then remember stumbling onto a dark set and seeing a clapboard in front of my face that looked something like this:


A shout of "action" and the clapboard quickly disappeared to reveal a jaw-dropping scene filled with desperation and sex.

( Close your eyes and say there's no place like homo )

Oops, you've seen me now haven't you?  [that's what happens when I imitate a detective spying on his neighbors with his lights on].

But I think I've figured out something that I witnessed.  That the "C" in CSI: New York stands for Crap.  With a capital C.

So I'm going to attempt to get back the 42 minutes and 40 seconds that Brian Gale wasn't walking down a staircase looking for a trick to fuck.

( I spy with my teary eye, Gale bottoming )

Isn't it sad to think that poor Randy would probably be pants-less if he didn't raid Gale's closet for dress-up-hand-me-downs?  [Not to mention topless if he accidentally threw out an old shirt.]  

Ok, maybe nakedness is preferable when it compares to looking at Randy with clothes on except when it involves something which looks suspiciously familiar...

( See evidence of Randy's mad tayloring but shitty laundering skillz! )

Who knew a single-serve of butter required flexing of muscle O_O

For super-sized rubber-gloved fist and arm porn [plus a little facial expression comedy]

( click here )

Sorry, but it was too good to hide behind a cut :b
 
Waddayaknow, his name tag *is* spelled correctly (it wasn't handwritten like Nora's)!

( and we have full frontal apron shot )

Hopefully most of  you have been too busy enjoying Social Grace Gale (and more social L/IJers) to not mind my absence ;) 

Well, I passed my most recent blood test and my prof, Dr [Necessary] Evil, said that I was "top of the class".  So I guess it's all the worry and stress leading up to these tests giving me a stomach ulcer (or 3).  And he had expected me to begin failing tests 3 months ago! *pfft*  Admittedly, the school I go to is so tough that the school newspaper has an obituary section.  

But I'm not sure I'm as smart as my dog, despite my time lecturing at the Institute of B/J & G/R Obsession.  Banjo's so smart he skipped puppy pre-school and went straight to the Sydney Kinney University: School of Queer as Canine.

You really need to see what a grand and pornographic historic institution it is and the subjects they study there *nods seriously*

( Motto: Bone Fido, Cum Laude )

Now before you run away with tears streaming down your face, I MUST show you that the humor love between G/R B/J is as strong as ever! ;)

( You wanna know what luv-fter is? )

First, a very late thank you for everyone's new year wishes.  Alas, I began the year with a whimper (invaded by a bug of the more conventional kind), then went on a riverside vacation where Banjo was attacked by a bitch (literally) and I couldn't get a breath (literally) because of a first-ever asthma attack (thankfully we were just scared shitless by the separate experiences).  So it's nice to return home and have my breath taken away in a positive, life-affirming way... 
( This picture of Dorian Gale *g* reminds me of something almost a decade ago... )

It looks as though  I can celebrate surviving another year on planet earth - and here's hoping no-one will be venturing to unsafe areas beyond the Outer Rim [Jobs of Brian], not even once-in-a-blue-moon ;) 

For anyone I haven't managed to stalk via snail mail or email, you can still look forward to my traditional LJ holiday greeting. Ok, who am I kidding, everyone knows it will be more twisted than traditional *smirk*

So who's ready to get up on stage with me to sing Kinky Karol Karaoke which I've speshully written with B/J in mind?

*Rings Jingles bells balls to provoke Pavlovian response of salivation*

( Now don't be shy, just follow the bouncing balls on the screen :b )

Jesus Christ Face of God on cracker snowflake cookie! ;)

Ok, did a little [calling] birdie tweet how I haven't been milking/drumming/piping/leaping/dancing around a patridge in a pear tree? 

Although in my song there are two turtle doves and an alien in a mummy.

( The Twelve Days of Not-Quite-Xmas )

Seriously, I'm beginning to scare myself and it's still not Halloween yet *points to icon I made over 4 years ago!!!!!*

Can you believe/remember it transpired from a comic book published in May 2005 called Rage Queer as Old Folk?  Written and illustrated by Yours Truly twisted.  Ok, you can probably believe that but can you believe that now Randy is going to play Mr Warmhole in a new musical?  Can you believe that I have the ability to fuck up foresee the future??!

Can you believe that I made this icon *almost 2 years before* they created an ad for that product with *that* slogan?  Can you believe these are not my only freaky cooincidences foreshadowings?  Can you believe my pooch peed on my bed but I didn't see that coming?  Can you believe I need sleep since it's nearly 3am?

Wait, I'm feeling woozy, so I better just gaze into Gale's greying hair eyes.   Well, if only I could see them through those Wayfarers.  I believe I can see his tits pecs better through his shirt.

( Gale finally grins and bears it )

I'd rather get crazy the positive life-affirming way than with IJ (or not se magic) glitches!!

*waves politely to any confuzzled peeps*

Anyboo, my pre-Halloween post is now fixed (scroll down to the blood and gore cuts ;)). I hope. There's a horrid layout to match but at least it doesn't decapitate things.

I've barely said boo re fandomy news but I think I've found a production still from Mr Howard's latest movie which I haven't seen mentioned yet.

But because I haven't applied my mad CSI skillz in a long time, I'm not entirely sure if the person in the picture is Gale because he and his co-star (who looks very familiar) are in horror-themed costume and makeup.

There's also a rumor that the film title will be changed to GB III: Anti-Breeder Ground.

( You may get an idea why when you see this )

Now before you run away screaming [again], there's actually a teaser clip on bootube

( under the cut for those afraid of the dark )

Meet Banjo. He stands up to five metres tall, weighs half a tonne, has three razor-sharp claws on each hand and, if you lived in Australia 98 million years ago, would have loved to have had you over for Sunday lunch.

Oh wait, that's not the Banjo I want you to meet, although this one does look a little like he's risen from the dead. With a new tale tail to tell wag.

He's an even spookier ( cuter sight in the orange light of an ah-maazing dust storm )

Please excuse the fact I'm still suffering from chemo vampyre!brain *iz glamored by my latest gale!icon*

In case anyone missed the CMF [Campus Movie Fest Cwazy Mixedup Fanz] Dreamz Fulfillment Workshop run by the world-renowned actor-between-jobs Gale Howard, there's a speshul on-line version now available!!!

Isn't it wonderful that Gale promotes filmmaking dreams come true and supporting people delusional hopeful fans who are trying to bring it them to life? *grins with pride*

( Log in to learn if you're cwazy )